Monday, December 18, 2017

A Dream in the Night


A Dream in the Night

December 18, 2017
Shipshewana, IN

I dreamed I was climbing a mountain. The path was cleared and marked. Others were climbing with me. The last stretch to the summit was very steep, nearly straight up. There were steps cut into the mountain, and a handrail. Anyone who let go of the handrail would tip over backward, down the mountain. There was a man climbing beside me, in obviously good physical condition, a seasoned climber. The man ahead of me let go, fell back, and was caught by the man beside me.

Suddenly the handrail ended. I stopped, desperately clinging to the smooth rock, not knowing what to do. Finally, I said out loud,

“What shall I do?”

A voice replied,

“Stand up.”

I stood, and realized the railing and steps had taken me over the top, and I had been lying facedown on the ground. The voice I heard came from a woman, sitting on a rock nearby. The man who had climbed beside me was there, but I did not see the man who had fallen and been caught.

I woke, completely exhausted, as if I had made the climb in real life.

Thursday, December 14, 2017

Three Days in the Trucker's Life

Three Days in the Trucker’s Life
December 13-14 2017

The Ranch Hand at Montpelier, Idaho, was our roost for the night. Turning off the truck and the bunk heater before sleep seemed a good idea. The Passenger woke in the wee hours, comfortable in position, but any movement necessitated warming a new spot on the sheets. A few hours later, after the Trucker had flipped the heater switch, she found it necessary to wake him with a request to turn off the oven. Starting the day at 16 degrees made a chilly walk to the ladies’ room. The night was still dark; it would be several hours til the eastern sky showed light. Forecast for this area was a “freezing fog” warning.

Driving west on Route 80, the sky gradually lightened and day began. With light, the work of freezing fog became visible. Every tree, bush, grass blade, fence wire, roof, was coated as if sprayed, with the most delicate of white crystals. Like snow, and yet not. Intricate designs, not one repeated. The slightest touch of a finger melted them away as if they’d never been. Fog obscured the road ahead, and the beauty of hills and valleys. But roadsides were a wondrous sight.




Hour after hour we rolled west, little variance in the amount of traffic or the temperature, which had dropped to 8 then hovered around 20 degrees. Freezing fog continued to offer us beauty throughout the day.

 Time was passed by reading aloud the autobiography of David Pawson, Not as Bad as the Truth, until the Passenger’s throat was too raw to continue. She then turned to stitchery, only to break her remaining needle of proper size. How does one break a needle on Aida cloth??

 Ever the provider, the Trucker located a WalMart at Burley, Idaho, the GPS assuring us trucks were welcome. Not until we were swinging wide to enter the lot, did a sign come into our view proclaiming an unwelcome and threat of fine for trucks. The Boot and Shoe Outlet next door held a sign proclaiming trucks would be “booted,” and charged handsomely for the privilege of the “boot.” A restaurant further down echoed similar sentiment.

 All those empty lots, but no room at the inn, as it were. Really, all needed was a needle and #318 DMC floss! Jerome, Idaho, was the next try, and yielded up a friendly WalMart. Not only was the Passenger re-supplied, but a lunch break was taken while parked in the lot. Lasagna for the Trucker, chicken and rice for the Passenger.



By afternoon, we reached the Stage Stop near Boise, Idaho. A dirt and gravel lot. A small building long on western-themed amenities and short on patrons, at the moment. It boasted restaurant, convenience store, restrooms. Showers, laundry, exercise room with four pieces of equipment, and a theater room with free popcorn were reached by a wide staircase to the second floor.

 We learned that adjoining the theater room (which was showing a movie that interested neither of us) was a small private lounge with cushy recliners. As the temperature and condition of the lot were not conducive to the brisk walk the Passenger was longing for, recliners at least offered a comfortable change in sitting position. She had already paced the convenience store and hallway enough to warrant curious looks from staff and clerks, and was not dressed for the exercise room, so this was where relaxation happened for a few hours, he with the remote, she with stitching.

Then it was on to a rest area a few miles down the road, so that the truck’s pass through the Boise truck scales would be on the current day’s record. Already a row of sleeping trucks were lined up, motors or generators purring a deep rumble against the cold, exhaust floating lazily out of their stacks like so many sleeping dragons. At the edge of dark, even though yet two hours earlier by our EST internal clocks, it was called a day. The Trucker soon joined the ranks of sleeping dragons, while his Passenger struggled with thoughts, emotions, and sleeplessness.

A cell phone chirp at 10:15pm EST heralded a terse note from the Trucker Son, regarding snow blowing past his window. You know your child has become an adult and carries matching responsibilities when the forecast for snow brings dread instead of dancing. A motherly promise to pray for his safety went unanswered; the sandman must have intervened.

The 2:00AM alarm sent the sandman scurrying from the Passenger’s eyes only 90 minutes after he had arrived. A quick trot through the 22 degree chill, then down the road to WinnCo Foods warehouse.

The Trucker stops at the guard shack, runs in his paperwork, and is assigned door 126. Stopping a few feet from the door, he again enters the cold to open trailer doors before backing to the dock. Then another run to the office with his paperwork. Now we wait.

The clock stands at 2:30AM EST. Truckers are under strict warning that engines are not to be idled, under pain of a hefty fine. At 26 degrees outdoors, the cab and bunk chill quickly. Though a perfect night to view the annual Geminid Meteor shower, it would take a walk down the road, away from warehouse and truck light pollution. The truck’s relative warmth and safety prevails. A nap would be in order, but as a call to pull out could come at any moment, said nap is not an option.

The call never comes. At 5:45am, the Trucker reaches his limit, and checks back at the office. Yes, they were done, miraculously, just now! The truck pulled forward, the doors closed, the stop at the guard shack, and we are off. Ten minutes down the road, a TA fuel stop and free hot shower, with points earned by the fuel purchase. The fuel/shower routine is as efficient as it is welcome. In 40 minutes the truck is moving on. By 7:30am, a rest area at Ontario, Oregon, still cloaked in darkness. Naptime.

On the road again at 10am. The Trucker is refreshed, the Passenger not so much. An attempt at reading aloud assures the Passenger this will not be a day for speaking. The low grade fever she is wearing would have come in handy for warmth yesterday. Freezing fog again overspreads the area, and the truck rolls west on Route 84. A noon breakfast stop happens at the cafe in North Powder, Oregon, in Oregon Trail area.


 Damp, misty weather creates mud that covers the parking lot.


Indoors, a small dining area creatively capable of seating 42 diners at once. Homemade Christmas cheer lines the walls and windowsills.


 A wood burning stove sends out welcoming rays of heat. An extremely clean, beautiful restroom, faucet already running until turned off by the Passenger. A nook holding a small gift shop, complete with first aid supplies, jewelry, scarves, gloves, books, and much more, all with a Christian theme. Back at the table, food arrives.  Portions were plentiful.


 A few stereotypical locals with vintage pickups containing dogs, stopped in for breakfast and were greeted by name. A rack of free paperbacks and magazines by the door included a farming quarterly featuring a professional rat killer complete with photo evidence.

Route 84 led us into the mountains of Oregon, still accompanied by freezing fog and its attendant loveliness. The fog thickened, until while coming down out of the mountains, the Trucker became highly uneasy about the possibility of encountering another truck in the fog and being unable to stop in time. Or being on the receiving end of an encounter by a truck coming up behind. Thankfully, at no time did roads become slick.



By 2pm, an email appeared, containing location, amount, and pickup number for the assigned backhaul. Apples, to be found in Tieton, Washington. The Trucker ponders contacting his second delivery point to inquire about moving his delivery time from Friday morning to Thursday afternoon. 

Route 84 carried us along the Columbia River, where at one point, the marvel of a dam appeared. Water bursting out of the spillway, created a mini Niagara. Workers’ vehicles were parked on the dam itself, and somewhere near were locks to raise water levels for passing barges. And the sun has appeared, our first sighting in two days.

By phone, the Trucker reaches the warehouse location where the remaining pallets on his trailer are to be deposited. They are actually quite busy tomorrow. Yes, they will take the load today. Be there by 2:30pm local time. That can happen. And the mountain pass in the Columbia River Gorge leading to the re-load point can be traveled tonight, before tomorrow’s rain potentially turns icy on the steep grades. And, while the passenger can enjoy the night view across the gorge without actually seeing how far it is to “down.”

A strong wind has kicked up, bringing concern to the Trucker’s face, and even more complete attention to the wheel and road. The Passenger hangs onto the slim comfort that given wind direction, if the empty trailer is caught and flipped by wind (a distinct possibility), it will be blown into the mountainside on the left, and not down the mountainside on the right.

And so, three days on the road have passed. More are to come, Lord willing and the traffic doesn’t rise.

Tuesday, December 12, 2017

Whithersoever Thou Goest...I'm Gonna Go

Whither Thou Goest...I’m Gonna Go
December 12, 2017

A rather uneventful Tuesday afternoon. 59 degrees in the sun, up from 16 at break of day. The Trucker is steering his green Kenworth across Nebraska on Route 80 West. His Passenger is steering her silver needle across a white piece of 14 count Aida cloth. Lively instrumental music dances from the CD player. The road is flat and straight, and empty. Laura Ingalls Wilder said that Nebraska is like Lydia Locket’s pocket. “Nothing in it, nothing on it, only the lining round it.” At this moment the Passenger would tend to agree.

Suddenly the Trucker reaches for the unsuspecting GPS unit, and with a determined yank, separates it from its base. Then a knife appears from his pocket, and is employed. This seems serious. Glancing up from her violet-threaded design, His Passenger inquires, “Is there something I can do for you?” The reply is an old family joke, “I can do it mineself.” OK then.

Next moment the Trucker produces a screwdriver from the region behind his seat, and commences whacking the GPS base with hefty swats of the screwdriver’s handle. At his Passenger’s inquiring look, he explains, “I don’t like the way it is sitting.” Hmmmm….does he like the way she is sitting? Do we even go there?

Now the head of the screwdriver is changed, and suddenly the base is in pieces on the console. By now the Passenger is sufficiently concerned enough to comment, “You do realize, that whithersoever thou goest, I’m gonna go as well?” He does realize. And in a few minutes, all screws are cranked back into proper place, the screen is reattached at a new angle, and all tools reassigned to their proper locations.

At no time did the green Kenworth sway, swerve, or in any way swing out from its path between the lines. At no time did the Trucker have both eyes off the road or both hands off the wheel. At no time did he lose awareness of the traffic around us. (What traffic, anyway?) I give up. I can’t even drive my needle with that kind of accuracy. And I will still go whithersoever he goest, ripping stitches along the way.



Remember in the Dark, What Was Visible in the Light

Remember in the Dark, What was Visible in the Light
December 12, 2017

A relatively quiet night, rolling west on I-80, 50 miles east of Council Bluffs, Iowa. Wind buffets the truck, dropping fuel mileage enough to add an unplanned stop. “Just a splash of fuel,” the Trucker said, “To tide us over to Lincoln.” The truck sways, fighting the pressure. Temperature stands at 28 degrees, down 4 in the last few minutes. Engine noise competes with the rushing of wind.

But the most significant sense is darkness. Black dark. Tonight it seems more than just the absence of light, but a presence. Were it not for the occasional white headlights of eastbound trucks, and red lights of those westward, the only lights would be our own. Such a lonely feeling. An all-by-myself-in-the-world sensation. Dark makes one vulnerable. The inability to see one’s path, or what may be nearby, can be crippling. Dark is a negative thing. Associated with fear and loss and insecurity.

Yet ahead, a curved row of red lights glow in the sky, slowly blinking. Not moving. We know they mark the rotating wind turbines spread out over the prairies. Faithfully turning to provide power. Regulated, so that even in a night of wintry blasts they are held from spinning out of control and causing great damage. Incredible power, these turbines. The secret of their power is the controlled setting in which they operate, no matter the pressure exerted by their surroundings. I do not need to see the windmills to know they are there. I just need to remember in the dark, what was visible in the light.

I think of the chariots and horses of fire that surrounded the city of Dothan, protection sent for the man of God, Elisha. Things looked dark for him, a hunted man. Yet that darkness was what brought the vision of fiery warriors. Darkness enabled me to see the flashing lights on the windmills, lights unnoticed in daylight.

Darkness has become a familiar enemy, representing confusion, loss, grief, pain. Pain so heavy, it is unable to be contained in the emotions, but overspreads to the physical. One by one, the lights of hope have been snuffed out, til few are left. I pray for God to open our eyes, that we may see the chariots and horses of fire, but that has not yet happened. For now, we struggle to remember in the dark, what was visible in the light.

I think of the turbines. Even though they are wind driven, they do not take advantage of the wildness of this night. Despite their potential, they continue the steady pace set for them. A pace appropriate for the needs they supply. Designed to rotate at 14.4rpm, the blade tips then are moving at 200mph. Turbines will ride out tornado force winds with no damage, no spinning out of control. But a malfunction in their machinery or settings, and they literally destroy themselves, and anything in the vicinity. When reaching 18rpm, they will do just that, as happened in Huron, Michigan in February, 2016. “It was there, we just didn’t see it,” according to the wind farm manager. One of three seals failed, putting added stress on the others. And 1.5 million dollars’ worth of equipment crashed to the ground, self destructed.

God has set a pace and a parameter in which I am to serve Him. Guidelines, for my protection. The difference between me and the wind turbines, though, is that I have a choice. I can choose to take on the pressure exerted by my surroundings, go my own way. He allows that. But eventually I will self destruct, taking others with me. Or, I can choose to operate under His control, trusting Him to set the pace of my rotations and the sphere of my influence. This choice provides protection for me, and all within my reach.



Topping a slight rise on the prairie, we see the lights of Omaha spread out ahead, sprinkling the darkness with perspective, guiding travelers toward their destinations. The truck rolls on through the black night, while we remember in the dark, what was visible in the light.